Teenage Workbook

2007-01-23T22:28:00.000+08:00

Stupid peopleWeather: Windy and ChillyListening to : It's Not Over/ Chris DaughtryThings are getting from bad to worse. Between me and my parents that is. I cant take it anymore though I know that there are more people out there taking more sh*t from their parents than I am.I remember how I used to keep it in and bear with it. But ever since I gave up on having talks with them in futile attempts

2006-10-01T23:09:00.000+08:00

The Truth about fatThe fact is I’ve grown fat. There is no point in hiding it. My mother complains I’m fat, my pompous classmate has already raised the alarm. So whose next? Well my grandama was the latest. Ironically, I’ve never felt so comfortable in my own skin. It’s the people around me who are making me feel conscious about myself. Being able to eat till you’re filled up is as if you’re a

2005-12-25T12:53:00.000+08:00

It's Christmas! =D We remember himWeather: Rainy.. the sun just got up not too longListening to: I'm so sick/FlyleafDear Shadow,New word I've Leant Today: ParaphernaliaMeaning: Personal BelongingsSometimes I dont understand why they use such a long word to describe something so simple =S anyways It's christmas. Greetings via email and sms is so old. So I'm gonna use a revolutionary way of sending

2005-12-08T09:50:00.000+08:00

I'm Feeling YouWeather: SunnyListening to: I'm Feeling You/ Michelle Branch feat. SantanaDear Shadow,It feels as if hope and happiness has been brought into my life. Oh by the way. I'm so happy there's another version of Pride and Prejudice is coming out. Darcy is sooo cute as always =)) But apparently, the critics didnt like it. Heard they tried to put a modern twist to it. Well there's already

2005-12-05T16:50:00.000+08:00

Walking on SunshineWeather: Cool after showers across Singapore =)Listening to: Here By Me/3 Doors DownDear Shadow,I didnt update my blog because I thought I didnt want to bore you with how wonderful my life is right now. You might have guessed it right but God really has plans for me. I feel so blessedWell other than that it was also because I'm really busy so much so I havent got time to do my

2005-11-23T08:21:00.000+08:00

So far so good... till he haunts me.Weather: Gloomy, nice to sleep inListening to: Moon/Lena ParkDear Shadow,Life's been pretty nice so far. After that low point in life, things kinda bounced back into shape. That's pretty good I suppose. Project Work and Choir brought me closer to the people in JJC. Which is good again i suppose. Well its better than not having any friends. I'm very happy the

2005-11-08T22:46:00.000+08:00

Birthday =))Weather: Pretty okay. I wanted it to rain thoughListening to: Girl Next Door/Saving JaneDear Shadow,2 Happy Surprises.Woke up with a pleasant surprise. Kathryn called!! =)) That was so sweet of her. We chatted for about 1 and a half hours. I bet her phone bill exploded. I guess I was too shocked to have any feelings. But come to think of it, it was really nice of her =)) I miss her

2005-10-29T10:35:00.000+08:00

Fcuked UpWeather: Pretty much nice to everyone elseListening to: Helena/ My Chemical RomanceDear Shadow,I was having utterly the worse day ever. I went back to school yesterday only to find myself pretty much ignored. Going to the barbercue to find that I've been doing most of the work and I didnt even enjoy much of it. My parents came way earlier despite telling them to pick me up one hour later

2005-10-11T21:44:00.000+08:00

Promo WoesWeather: Too Dark.. cant seeListening to: I'm not okay/ My Chemical Romance ( really i'm not okay.)Dear Shadow,You know what sucks. When you studied and expected better grades when they turn out the way you least expected. You know what... I scored 49 for Econs. I had 21/30 for MCQ, 14/20 for DRQ and 14/50 for my freaking Essay. You see!! I didnt have enough time to pen my essays! Its

2005-09-05T17:46:00.000+08:00

God Help me.Weather: SunnyListening to: My Chemical RomanceDear Shadow,I feel like I'm going crazy. Everytime I listen to My Chemical Romance, I hear something inside calling me. Although it seems entriely stupid but when I hear MCR, I just feel that I would know them someday. Recently I don't know why. I cant get the feeling off... the feeling that I know I will be a successful vocalist.

2005-08-14T20:01:00.000+08:00

I'm so stupid/ Last bit of funWeather: Cloudy and sunnyListening to: Ting Bu Dao/Liang Jing Ru You Ni Duo Hao/Cai Chun JiaDear Shadow,Things have becomed slightly better. Maybe because I finally enjoyed myself this weekend. I had loads of fun on friday and saturday. But its what happened during that period that made me realise something. Suddenly my heart feels heavy

2005-08-03T22:40:00.000+08:00

Short StoriesWeather: Can't see anything right now. Dark.Listening to: Wo hen wo ai ni/ Zhang Hui Mei Ji De/Zhang Hui MeiDear Shadow,This entry would mostly showcase lyrics from songs as well as my feelings in forms of short stories. I hope you'd understand what I'm going through now."I wake up in the morning,Put on my face.The one that's gonna get me, Through another

2005-07-31T10:04:00.000+08:00

Sleepover.Weather: Can't see from behind the curtainsListening to: Backgound music coming from Teen TitansDear Shadow,Wassup? Things turned for the better. I guess. Well... At least I don't have to be alone hanging out with her anymore. Kind of talked it out with someone from school. At least there are people who understand? Glad I have red cross friends. I wonder what I would do without them.

2005-07-28T23:37:00.000+08:00

I've never really forgotten you.Weather: Fine, not too cloudy but not too sunny either =)Listening to: Yong Gan/ Zhang hui mei- A*meiDear Shadow,Once there was a girl. She wanted everything. Recognition, popularity, love. In search of fufilment, she chased after her dreams. Not knowing dreams are just beautiful illusions, she went ahead, leaving behind her friends, her family and her very soul.

2005-07-26T22:59:00.000+08:00

* Tagboard is now open.Better day? Maybe not.Weather: Rainy in the morning. Got Wet.Listening to: Single/Natasha Beddingfield Safe In A Crazy World/ Corrinne MayDear Shadow,I kinda screwed up my SPA today. My titrations were totally off. Wow. I'm in for SUCH a treat. Guess what? I'm left with Chemical tutorial, Mathematics tutorial and Economics tutorial for tonight. I'll

2005-07-25T18:46:00.000+08:00

*You can tag on my chatterbox =)Another bad day... when will it ever end.Weather: Rainy Listening to: Hear me/Kelly Clarkson Shake it off/Mariah CareyDear Shadow,It's a really terrible day at school. Had napfa today. Ran like mad but did worse than before. I felt like I pushed myself slightly too much. I hadnt recovered. Worse thing is... I have to go for make-up pe just

2005-07-24T10:48:00.000+08:00

*You can now leave messages on my tagboardI Havent Ever Really Found A Place Called Home.Weather: Pretty much the same, its either rainy or sunnyListening to: You're Beautiful/James BluntSafe In A Crazy World/Corrinne MayDear Shadow, I'm beginning to accept the fact that there's nothing that really belongs to me in this world. Feeling detached. Weird, Outcasted and Different? I guess its normal.

2005-07-17T10:33:00.000+08:00

Just another day...Weather: Pretty bright after a rainy dayListening to: Wo Hen Wo Ai Ni/ Zhang Hui MeiDear Shadow,When I know I'm down, I can always come back here. I hope nothing here changes, maybe you're the thing that I can hold on, to count on in my weary days. Life, has become more and more absurd. Just when I thought I could let him go, he came back to my mind. I want to get him out of

2005-06-21T16:56:00.000+08:00

If there's one thing I'll die from, it will be diabetes.Weather: really cloudyListening to: The other side of the world/ KT TunstallDear Shadow,I bought a book recently, about the controversies of women and their deepest darkest desires. The story would have worked for me if I hadnt found out who the author was. I would have rather known it were true. But in some ways, marriage isn't all that

2005-05-24T20:53:00.000+08:00

Breathe No More.Weather: Rainy and sunny, the usual. my life? not the usual you getListening to: We belong together/Mariah CareyDear shadow,Everything has been going wrong. Seriously wrong. The series of unfortunate events that happened today.-Failed maths test-Classmates failed to complete the present for the International Friendship Day Project-Saw A Pair of Medium sized moths ( bout the width

2005-05-19T20:05:00.000+08:00

A dedication to my dad =)Weather: Rain and shine, so on and so forth...Listening to: My Boo/Alicia keys feat. UsherDear Shadow,Whew... Thank God this week is over! JC life is really stressful! Guess what? I passed my Chemistry test! But that doesnt mean I can do without my promos! I've been screwing up everything. If not for the grace of God I'd be in the pits. I just wanted to thank my dad for

2005-05-08T18:18:00.000+08:00

I'm blessedWeather: Torrential rains! hahaListening to: Qian Nian Zhi Lian/F.I.RDear Shadow,Life hasnt been a bed of roses for me. I don't know why I've been making people angry recently. It's not that I dont have friends, but even when they are around, I still feel lonely and all. Sometimes I wonder if I should keep my mouth shut or something. Sigh. Busy busy busy. Haha aneeway I got the letter

2005-05-05T18:26:00.000+08:00

The Season Of Yellow FlowersWeather: Dark, damp,wetListening to: 止戰之殤/ Jay ChouDear Shadow,Today, life was pretty okay. I survived the 2 hour chinese period and Dr Gan's chemistry lessons. Like what Lifen said, we ought to learn how to appreciate her chemistry "jokes" hahaha. GP excited me because I love to do stuff on mass media and how advertising works on others. However... I was the only one

2005-04-28T20:22:00.000+08:00

Life just got better. Right.Weather: Windy and thundering O.OListening to: My Immortal/ EvanescenceDear Shadow,Wassup? Things have been really busy lately, the unending plie of work is quite a burden. SYF is approaching really soon. The bad thing is, we aren't nervous. I feel so... Useless. If I can reach the highest note of Phantom Of The Opera, I don't understand why I can do Sop 1, or double

2005-04-21T20:17:00.000+08:00

He wasn'tWeather: Damp.Listening to: We Belong Together/Mariah CareyDear Shadow,It's been awhile since I written. Been really busy lately. There were loads of events before today. Choir practices, Cheerleading sessions (Council), Preparation for campaigning, Singing Practices for Teenage Idol + tons and tons of work *bleahz*. Anyway most of it has ended. I didn't get into the Semi Finals of

2005-03-27T22:19:00.000+08:00

First time.Weather: Cloudy, rainyListening to: Hear Me/Kelly ClarksonDear Shadow,Today is one of the worst days of my life. Everything still seemed fine in the morning and then, my mother had to say those words. " Don't participate in any other competitions after this." I reluctantly said yes. But deep in my heart I rejected those words. It brought back painful memories. I remembered when I was

2005-03-24T22:28:00.000+08:00

WOooOoo~ *whispers* JJ...Weather: You make me wanna lala... who cares man?Listening to: Get Right/J LoDear Shadow,I'm been okay at JJ. The stuff they do at JJ is stupid but when everyone does it, it isnt. You just have to learn how to enjoy it. So far, I got to know all the girls, but I was only introduced to the guys today... indirectly la. Oh well, I always want to know people ahaha not the

2005-03-16T23:01:00.000+08:00

The day before the big eventWeather: No ideaListening to: NothingDear Shadow,I'm really nervous, I hope I don't screw up. But you know what? I'm not going to let those people down, I want to prove to people I am able to do it and I can. I am who I am and do what I do best. I can do it, I just have to believe in it. I've done it before and I will do it again. I will not falter. It has been my

2005-03-15T12:43:00.000+08:00

FriendsWeather: Sunny *typical*Listening to: Give me a reason/ The CorrsDear Shadow,This is the first time in a few weeks I'm eating ice cream. All cos of stupid Shu Wei. She's been my red cross buddy and my close friend since Secondary 1. Since last year onwards, we havent gone out for more than once! When we ask her out, she's always out with her friends as usual. Am I even important to her?

2005-03-12T14:16:00.000+08:00

Exist.Weather: The usual, it doesnt snow around here.Listening to: Forever Rachel/Nubuo UematsuDear Shadow,I've been feeling pretty emtpy lately. I don't know why I can't seem to find something that can fill me up. I've been going out a lot lately, maybe it's because I've been trying to occupy my mind with something else, I don't know what I'm trying to hide from but it's no use. I have no idea

2005-03-06T20:07:00.000+08:00

My views and opinions about LoveWeather: Pretty warm but still bearable. =)Listening to: Incredible/ DariusDear Shadow,This entry is not going to be an in-depth and philsophical explanatory. I'll just write whatever that comes to my mind. These kinda thoughts always happen after I read romantic cum hillarious novels like Meg Cabot's The Boy Next Door as well as The Waitress written by Melissa

2005-03-03T22:27:00.000+08:00

Pain? Confusion? Just not me today.Weather: ChillyListening to: Daisuki Da Yo/Ai OtsukaDear Shadow,Things are very different. I can't get the hang of myself. I suddenly feel that I need God's healing hands right now. Not that I'm really troubled but... I don't understand... What's wrong with me. Why can't people just listen to what I say and stop irritating me. Sorry i was irritated by my

2005-03-01T08:18:00.000+08:00

God's grace and mercyWeather: Fairly cloudy and HumidListening to: Hear Me/ Kelly clarkson.Dear Shadow,I'm really happy that I went to church on sunday. I still remember that i was contemplating if I should attend church that morning. I'm glad I did because God showed me how much he really loved me and that I am his beloved, therefore he will take care of me and no curse of the law shall befall

2005-02-17T20:37:00.000+08:00

I Hate YouWeather: Surprisingly humidListening to: Missing/ EvanescenceDear Shadow,I've been really bad lately. Sigh... though everyday is a normal day without a doubt. Life isn't like before. I really wish kathryn was here. All along she was my pillar of strength and her house was my hiding place. Now that she's gone. I'm left alone. Though I do have new friends. The closer ones are guys.

2005-01-17T22:30:00.000+08:00

Moments To Remember Weather: Dark and Cloudy Listening to : Behind These Hazel Eyes/Kelly Clarkson Dear Shadow, Its been a long time even though the year has just started. To me, it's already been a long time and I really wish it were about to end. Here are this list of more important events which happened so far. [*] Orientation in Millenia Institute -3 day event- The first day was totally

2005-01-01T10:34:00.000+08:00

Horrible Start Weather: Cloudy Listening to: Surrender/Evanescence Dear Shadow, How do you like your new layout? Cool huh.. the stars actually shimmer... Well kinda haha. I think they look really pretty but they will just jam up someone's computer cos it will continously load, in case you didn't know. Oh well, just when I thought my life was back to no problemo, its back to problematic. Have

2004-12-31T23:36:00.000+08:00

The last entry of the year. Weather: Rainy Listening to: Wishing you were here with me/ The Phantom Of The Opera Dear shadow, Wow what a long time. Sorry I didn't update recently. I wanted to... about some boy problems... gee. That was the last thing I thought would ever happen to me. How bout a short synopsis about the year 2004? Sounds interesting? I'll go ahead with it then. [*]

2004-12-02T21:03:00.000+08:00

Interview with an Ex-gangster Weather: Gone Crazy [ Rain & Shine ] Listening to: Wo Men De Ai/ F.I.R Dear Shadow, Hey... it's like my first day of work. You know what? I did better for my training. Gee... Celina buck up! Jia you! Tomorrow you can hit the target of 25. You can You can!! Oh well.. this was just a prelude of what's going on with me. This entry will be about my mentor, who is

2004-11-25T15:39:00.000+08:00

One love consultant & one middleman Weather: Rainy Listening to: Baby it's you/ Jojo Dear Shadow, It's kinda strange to have my kor beside me while I'm writing this... feels abit weird. [Kor: Can save me the trouble of reading it next time. =) ] Oh well... I wanted to blog yesterday but I didn't somehow. Ok on to yesterday's story, I was at my friend's place. We hung out, ate pizzas *Pepperoni!

2004-11-19T08:20:00.000+08:00

Phenopthalen Weather: Sunny, Bright. Cheery...Whatever Listening to: Save Your Kisses For Me/ Natasha Thomas ( The Lacoste Pink Advert ) Dear Shadow, I have no purpose in writing this entry. I'm just so happy I probably couled spell phenopthalen! Nothing much to be happy about though. Currently can't concentrate and will find a way to study effectively. End Result: Going to the library later.

2004-11-10T14:38:00.000+08:00

Unstable Weather: Cloudy Listening to: My immortal (piano version)/ Amy lee Dear shadow, I'm really really afraid to see what Cherie has written. I'm so discouraged about my stupid A math. I'm so scared that my teacher will start scolding me and demoralising me about my A math. I don't even know what I'm doing. Am I going crazy or something? Believe it or not I'm asking myself if I should go to

2004-09-29T19:07:00.000+08:00

28. Weather: Cloudy... I know the reason why Listening to: Till I Get Over You/Michelle Branch Dear Shadow, I regretted not looking at the moon earlier last night. By the time I wanted to appreciate the moon, it already rose above. Things weren't going very well yesterday, had two major events happening. The funny thing is that... i just felt numb. Its either okay. Or its either really bad. I

2004-09-27T20:07:00.000+08:00

[Strictly only to be read by the "victims" in my blog with the exception of my kor] Hurt and afraid. Weather: Cloudy, Full moon Listening to: Say something anyway/Bellefire Dear Shadow, I've been feeling really horrid these 3 days ever since my friend told me something that I don't know if I should know. * but the hurt generated will always be there * When I first heard it, my world went

2004-09-21T18:11:00.000+08:00

What. Weather: Cloudy, the usual *Just the way I like it Listening to: Beautiful soul/Jesse Mccartney Having a headache... gee. Something's not right with me. You know I still have like at least 20 more entries to my diary before i can keep it in a time capsule or stuff it somewhere so that 30 years down the road i can read it or something. That's very long. I better finish up this diary so that

2004-09-14T17:20:00.000+08:00

Missing in action Weather: Humid Listening to: Prince Charming/Willa Ford Dear Shadow, Sorry for the disappearing act. I was kinda pissed off and didn't want to blog because Blogger deleted the whole entry which I happened to pour out all my feelings and emotions on that day. Gee I guess I'm not meant to post it eh? A few days ago, my aunt who was a radio DJ at Mediacorp came to visit my

2004-09-07T09:06:00.000+08:00

Beyond my control. Weather: Partially Cloudy Listening to: Leave The Others ALone/Sohpie Ellis Bextor Dear Shadow, Okay, I wasnt planning to type about what I'm gonna type next but I found it pretty weird. When I first told my mum some stuff, she told me she felt like crying. I didn't shout or anything. I was just talking some sense into her, although i was a little irritated because she kept

2004-09-04T16:52:00.000+08:00

Red nose. Weather: Sunny, slightly cloudy Was- Listening to: My last breath/Evanescence Dear Shadow, Had an absolutely fabulous time with Kathryn and Jie Bin at the tennis court yesterday. After the exams, we straight away went down to Keppel club to play tennis! This is the first time I'm attempting this sport. I had a hard time learning how to surf and hit because I was too used to hitting the

2004-09-02T19:08:00.000+08:00

These days. Weather: Rainy! It rained again!! Listening to: Last Night Of The World/Lea Salonga & someone... I really wanted to write about the outing I had with my mum at TeaSpa. Unfortunately, that guy had to spoil it all. Well... it was my mum's 50th or 49th birthday I dunno which, and she decided to treat me to lunch. Apparently she gave me two choices. Prego and TeaSpa. I wanted to go to

2004-09-01T23:39:00.000+08:00

Short script. Weather: Not sure Listening to : Nothing? This is going to be a short one though. I'm really gonna start complaining about that freaking conceited as nono conceited isn't a good word. Ignorant i should say! He basically just insulted me while talking to me. I really feel like slapping him in the face! I think i should bother to type out what he wrote. Msn me if you wanna know the

2004-08-31T14:11:00.000+08:00

hard to control things like these. Weather: Hot! Listening to: Leave (Get Out)/ JoJo If I Can't Have You/ Yvonne Elliman Dear shadow, Things have been pretty unstable with each and every passing day. My main concern is not about my studies but my friendships. Recently, things have not being smooth. Agruments or small little squabbles day by day. =( I really don't

2004-08-29T13:25:00.000+08:00

Some things in life. Weather: Sunny Listening to: Ecstasy/ATB *I have no idea whats that but it's kinda nice Came back from church feeling tired, enlightened and some what refreshed? I just don't feel like starting on work yet. Cleared up stuff with the person. Gosh! My space bar is driving me crazy! Anyway was really worried if i would end up crying like i did over the email. Maybe because it

2004-08-24T21:23:00.000+08:00

Ruined. Weather: Rather cloudy, didn't rain though =( Listening to: Happy ending/Avril lavigne Dear Shadow, Everything was pretty okay today. Except for the fact that Noddy had to spoil the whole day. During ORCA or the reading period, instead of reading their books, Reshpal had to go and fool around and disturb Noddy. Reshpal never learns his lessons. That is the cause of his downfall. He is

2004-08-22T14:18:00.000+08:00

Sunday! Weather: Partially cloudy, really hot outside now. Listening to: Find your way back/Michelle Branch Yeah! Today is a sunday! No school. But the sad thing is there is school tomorrow. And you know what? A maths mock exam =(. Never mind, exams are always there for a reason. As long as I do my part of studying, the spirit will help me with the rest =) Went to church ALONE, for the first

2004-08-20T18:51:00.000+08:00

Thinking again! Weather: Cloudy and cooling! Listening to: Sexy, Naughty, Bitchy/Tata young Dear Shadow, Haha don't ask why I'm listening to that song. I'm just in the mood to listen to that haha. Actually Tata young isn't that bad la. She has some really interesting songs like Cinderella and I believe. I suppose it highlights the different aspects of a modern woman. In terms of love, social

2004-08-19T18:10:00.000+08:00

40th entry... Weather: Yeah~! It rained! Listening to: Only Hope/Mandy moore Dear Shadow, I found out eating maltesers was just the right thing to do when you're feeling unhappy, stressed, wadeva. Just finished oral. I could start banging myself in the head... ah!!! This is why i like to use a blog. You can just start typing nonsense and complain till you feel better. Haha I don't know whats

2004-08-18T21:24:00.000+08:00

Pretty lifeless. Weather: Didn't rain as usual Listening to: Breakaway/Kelly clarkson Dear shadow, Tomorrow is my english oral examination. I'm starting to get jittery. Sheesh... I worry too much. =( Maybe I should stop scaring myself. God is always with me. Why should i be afraid? As long as I do my best, he will help me. =) Well, i suppose things got better today. Yp and Wx finally had a

2004-08-17T17:56:00.000+08:00

Beautiful Disaster Weather: Bright and sunny Listening to: Beautiful Diasaster/kelly clarkson [again!] Dear shadow, You're kinda lucky i tell you alot of stuff. I suppose this is my substitute diary, where i can rant and complain about anything and everything. It's really funny. When I'm like super depressed, at the edge where I am contemplating to slit my wrist just to scare my parents, no one

2004-08-16T17:00:00.000+08:00

Ironical Weather: Kinda misty this morning Listening to: Beautiful Disaster/Kelly Clarkson Dear Shadow, I suppose this was not a very pleasant day. I was expecting lots of scolding from the teachers because i had TWO Major pieces of homework incompleted. * I was busy revising, to me revision is more important than homework now. I prayed for God's mercy and *poof~!* there I go! Instead of asking

2004-08-14T10:47:00.000+08:00

Stressed but happy... 14/9/2004 Weather: Sunny perhaps? Listening to: Leave right now / Will Young Dear Shadow, I have been pretty busy lately. Not really doing well... I really have to start bucking up. Trying to really relax now so that i'll have some energy to study =). My brain has been like in a coma. It wont like wake up or rather i can't get it working. =S I've got a B3 for chinese.

2004-07-17T21:19:00.000+08:00

I don't exist... 17/7/04 Weather: Gone crazy... I don't really give a damn Listening to: On my own Dear Shadow, I guess you are all that i have now. I'm so pissed off... i feel like crying. No one would bother any way. Maybe my mum would but i wont tell her anything. Why? because i dn't want to worry her. Why am i pissed/ feel like crying? Cos my grandma told me not to be so angry because my

2004-07-15T22:57:00.000+08:00

Unappreciated & Ignored...15/07/04 Weather: The usual. It just rained in the morning Listening to: reflections (korean) Dear Shadow, I've just realised how little i have been communicating with my mother. Everyday, all i see her do is come home, eat, watch a little bit of Tv before sleeping. I don't really have an exisiting relationship with my mother. It possibily mean i have a part to play. I

2004-07-08T17:24:00.000+08:00

Black fingernails...July/08/04 Weather: Grey skies Listening to: you set me free Dear Shadow, Sorry for not being able to blog earlier, been really busy lately. Life has changed rapidly for me even thouogh its hardly noticeable. 1 year has already passed since I first told him how i felt. One year is long enough. I don't know why but I'm always prone to internal conflict. The song Further

2004-06-06T20:31:00.000+08:00

Lonley star...06/06/04 Weather: Endless blur skies Listening to: Everybody cries Dear shadow, I guess today's entry will be different than the previous few. These few months, I've realised that i have not been blogging consistantly. I think i have the reason. I've lost my soul. Life has been empty, never filled with any real emotion. Each day, i passed my time together with someone or something

2004-05-26T21:27:00.001+08:00

Judgement day... tomorrow 26/5/04 Weather: Rain... sun... rain Listening to: Solitude / Evanescence Dear Shadow, Gosh, its only 5 days before the O' level chinese. Mannn... kinda resting now...after this evening i will chiong like crazy again. By popular demands or rather letters of complains due to the fact my blog is "out-dated", i shall add in some life. =D Recently, i've been having lots

2004-05-17T21:44:00.000+08:00

2 weeks O level chinese =(... 17/5/04 Weather: Pretty fine Listening to: Broken-Soundtrack to The Punisher / Seether feat Amy lee Dear Shadow, Kinda just felt like calling you that. Been pretty unstable lately... nothing to do with guys though. More on family and my internal struggles. I know where i am going/ I noe where i am heading... its just... just that... i need someone to pull me through

2004-05-01T11:37:00.000+08:00

A month before chinese O levels...1/5/04 Weather : hmm... partially cloudy? Listening : Desperately / Michelle Branch Mann... i love to study on fridays... okay more like slacking away. But.. I did make an effort to do work okaaay!! hahah. Well anyway yeah studying and talking yesterday, having an impromptu fellowship. I kinda like it. ^^ Made me kinda feel revived again. Those who stayed back

2004-04-26T21:25:00.000+08:00

Please, please forgive me But I won't be home again Maybe someday you'll look up And barely conscious you'll say to no one Isn't something missing You won't cry for my absence I know You forgot me long ago Am I that unimportant Am I so insignificant Isn't something missing Isn't someone missing me Even though I'd be sacrificed You won't try for me, not now Though I'd die to know you love me I'm

2004-04-19T21:15:00.000+08:00

I feel....19/04/04 Weather : Humid but not as bad? Listening : My immortal / Evanescence I'm so emotionally confused i just had to blog. I just wonder, does anyone need me in this world. I wonder if i even important at all. My parents, would their lives be the same without me? My friends? The could probably find others without me? I guess the one i used to like deeply wont even bother about my

2004-04-18T22:13:00.000+08:00

The end of a relaxing weekend...18/04/04 Weather : As humid as ever Listening to : Yours / Mariah Carey Hmmm just finished doing most of my work? My kor just asked me a question,"What if love can be measured by how much our heart bleeds..." And i told him, "If it were the case, i would have bleed to death long ago." Suddenly i just felt something ache within. I dont want to question, I dont want

2004-04-16T23:13:00.000+08:00

The love novel...16/04/04 Weather: Very hot and humid Listening to : In the middle / Sugababes I just finished watching [Princess moon] from Blueprint 2. Its one of the best reality love stories i've seen. I wish i could write like the author.... he's really good and he got me stuck with one of his phrases. "Love can only be measured byt the crater it leaves in your heart." Wasnt thinking of

2004-04-14T17:55:00.000+08:00

The wake up call...14/04/04 Weather: Humid and Sunny! >.< Listening to : Missing / Evanescence I was reflecting about stuff last night, and something hit me in the head. I'm not the only one who is going through all these problems, my friends are too... What if they never bothered to tell me like i never bother to tell them. What if they want someone to care for them deep inside. Why didnt it

2004-04-13T22:31:00.000+08:00

The real issue...13/04/04 Weather: Cloudy Listening to: Missing / Evanescence I know this may sound stupid... maybe i'm insensitive to my surroundings, maybe i'm insensitive to the feelings of others. But what i'm gonna to say are my true thoughts and feelings. What ever you think about me, will not affect me. Just really need to talk to someone or something. Currently everyone is busy from

2004-04-09T08:48:00.000+08:00

Stress week edtion...09/04/04 Weather: Humid but cloudy Listening to: Strong enough / Stacie Orrico This week was one hectic one. Rushing here there everywhere!! My activities were packed back to back. I'm sure i'm not the only student who is that busy. In singapore, there is hardly any time to take a rest. Its no wonder the workers are soo stressed so much so the birth rate has hit an all time

2004-03-29T20:30:00.000+08:00

The Busy Week edition... 29/3/04 Weather: Dark and cloudy... menancing Recently many things happened. Many... too many to count i guess... Well my paternal grandmother has just passed away last week. yeahh... wasnt sad but... just shocked. School was back to normal i guess. Time seemed to slow down that week. Friends? well.... they are back... but not as close as before. Thats just how i feel.

2004-03-17T11:31:00.000+08:00

The *Nepal [service learning] Edition... 8 days Weather: None [*]Day one Woke up at like 5.50 in the morning. I was so scared I was gonna be late. Good thing I got there in time. Anyway people were there and they all started checking into the counter. I was like somewhat there with no friends. Looking out for suet lin cos she was the only girl from C class to go to Nepal. Okay so I hung out

2004-03-05T23:09:00.000+08:00

You wont noe how much i will miss all of you... esp *you.

2004-02-26T18:04:00.000+08:00

Inner Heart special...26/2/04 Weather: Getting cloudy at this time of the day I really wanted to write lotsa stuff here but i guess i didnt have the time? Now is the time? the [x] stress factor Not too long ago before the footdrill competition, my life was quite stressful i should say. Usually i could handle the pressure but it was too much. I've been making the effort to balance out

2004-02-17T21:50:00.000+08:00

The rusted scissors edition...17/2/04 Weather: As usual.... what could be worse The cold left an imprint on my hand as i clasped it round my palm. It was an old pair of scissors, rusting. The smell, a metallic stench. The image of my grandmother cutting pieces of cloth to sew dresses in her younger days passed my mind. As i looked at its fading coat of black, i wondered. What if it were the only

2004-02-14T19:24:00.000+08:00

The Valentine's day edition...14/2/04 Weather: Awfully hot... :S Valentine's day is a day where love is celebrated all over the world. Couples holding hands down the streets. Candlelight dinners, 99 roses. Last night i saw this guy, he had like 9 heart shaped balloons in red and pink tied to his bag. I was thinking, " if my boyfriend gave me those balloons, i'll be damn happy, i'll probably

2004-02-11T20:50:00.000+08:00

10 more days, i'm scared edition...12/02/04 Weather: Slightly warm The drill compeition is coming soon. I'm scared. What will happen? would it be like last year, where we were the second place but finally got switched to being fourth? I really dont want it to happen again. "Oh lord, i pray that we can get in, please make our cadets cooperate with one another." I dont want FMSSRCY to be fourth

2004-02-05T16:10:00.000+08:00

Life in school edition...5/2/04 Weather: Rainy... i like... except for the wet curtains :S Life has been pretty much ongoing and repeitative. Studying as usual, having red cross foot drill sessions and stuff like that? Lots of red cross activites. Not only that tuitions count as well. If i included homework. Almost 3/4 of my life would be taken up?! Goshh... its getting real busy for everyone

2004-01-30T21:19:00.000+08:00

The X - country/ love-hate edition...30/1/04 Weather: Cloudy in some areas Today was probably one of the busiest days in my life. Had X country. Didnt bring the list somemore. Then run here run there to make sure everything is alright. After that set up base. People collapsed at the finish line. The red cross at the first aid base supported them, carried them, treated them. At the end of the day

2004-01-24T10:18:00.000+08:00

The chinese new year/ trick the parents edition...24/1/04 Weather: It's raining all morning! ^^ Sheesh just taken my readings and my pulse was like 102--98 haha very shocking yeah? cant be helped... the last time i took was like urmm 78? haha i dunno why it became so fast. Anyway, Chinese new year wasnt much of a dissapointment compared to last year. The reunion dinner was fine... talked to the

2004-01-19T21:36:00.000+08:00

The Rainy day edition...19/1/04 Weather: Rainy in the evening You know i think that my "family" treats me very well. For instance, My *mum and *sis cares for me very much, you know when i need advice or when i need to be taken care of. I really am grateful for them. My *dad is concerned about me la... but i don't really talk to him nowadays. My + Kor / i put a different sign because he does not

2004-01-18T10:40:00.000+08:00

You are Form 9, Vampire: The Undying. "And The Vampire was all that remained onthe blood drowned creation. She attempted toregrow life from the dead. But as she wasabout to give the breath of life, she wasconsumed in the flame of The Phoenix and thecycle began again." Some examples of the Vampire Form are Hades (Greek)and Isis (Egyptian). The Vampire is associated with the concept ofdeath,

2004-01-18T07:56:00.000+08:00

The mix-up / Jerk edition... Weather: Still kinda cloudy for a morning Beginging of a sunday. Mmm.. i am expected myself to get a scolding from my parents later on in the evening? Why? Maybe my mum has been in a bad mood? Maybe she is concerned about me studying? As a result, I will have to study in the morning. Haven't really thought about what to study but i'm surely not geared up for my tests

2004-01-11T22:27:00.000+08:00

Back to normal, happy without you... 11/01/03 Weather: Unusally cold and cloudy Just a day just an ordinary day.... probably? I guess life has returned to somewhat normal and i am hapy the way it should be ^^ lalala... I hope everyday stays the same. I guess i really dislike changes nowadays. Maybe because of the upcoming tasks, maybe because I'm afraid of the future. But whatever it is, I hope

2004-01-09T20:00:00.000+08:00

I wish i was the old me...9/1/04 Weather: The sun was pretty strong in the evening You probably never noticed the change. When i am happy, i am no longer happy. I feel emotionless. What i see is not what it appears to be. I feel disillusioned. I guess the only time where i can be myself is when i talk to my Kor, maybe because i talk to him more often than my close buddies. Having some personal

2004-01-03T20:26:00.000+08:00

The Red Cross Orientation / Mum's driving me nuts edition...3/12/04 Weather: Very super sunny... Today was quite a day for me. I slept at 12 last night and woke up at 7.30... i couldnt wake up. I went to school about 8? Then we started setting up the red cross booth. It was time to recruit the sec 1's. Those innocent faces showed their ugly side... okay not really their ugly side la huh? Yeahh

2003-12-31T23:54:00.000+08:00

The new year's eve edition...31/12/03 Weather: Sunny with partial cloudiness My new year's wish for this year is the score really well for my O levels. If i could have another i wish for everyone to be healthy and happy. I hope i am not selfish by giving the first wish to myself. I hope my new year's resolution will not be broken. It cant be... -// As we await the new year, look back and

2003-12-30T22:15:00.000+08:00

The opening to hell- A new year...30/12/03 Weather: Cloudy yet sunny Not in a very good mood now so i'll just cut short about the events today and go straight to the point. Right now i ammm sooo pissed that i can say the F word 10 times. She just gave me a big fat lecture. For what? For nothing. I'm so pissed. She feels that i everyday never study and next year she says i better start chiongin

2003-12-28T23:07:00.000+08:00

God's love is forever... 28/12/03 Weather : Sunny It was just an ordinary sunday. Woke up early to go to church with amamda. Listened to pastor prince and his sermon on why Jesus had to die on the cross.He had to die so that the curse of the law would be removed. It was only through the cross not through stoning. It was something different though not as funny as i expected. But on the whole it

2003-12-24T23:07:00.000+08:00

The christmas eve letter 24/12/03 Weather : Fine and windy Was feeling jumpy this whole morning. Until they came. Well played gunbound this morning. Played piano fer a while. Really enjoyed it. Played the usual swan lake and evanescence : bring me to life. I guess i kinda improved? Made a new friend today again... mmm i wonder where all the girls dissapeared to. I spent most of my time chatting

2003-12-22T20:05:00.000+08:00

Introduction Helloo.... wanted to write about something personal... but then again it should be something happy and not depressing sooo.... something short to start off with my first entry. :D